We got a Volvo last year. Now every time I drive, I see Volvos everywhere.

Before that, my brain noticed Audis, BMWs, Škodas. Those are almost invisible to me now, and the roads are suddenly full of Volvos. The roads didn't change. My focus did.

This is called the red car theory: your brain only sees what it's tuned for.

The part I find a bit scary is that it works the same with people. When you decide what you want in life, what kind of people you want around, what behavior you expect, those people start showing up. And the ones who don't match? You filter them out before you even build a deeper relationship with them. They pass through your day the way BMWs now pass through mine: physically there, never registered.

I can't tell you how much of this is documented science and how much is just my experience. I only know the Volvo test proves the mechanism daily, and I have no reason to think my brain runs a different algorithm for people than it does for cars.

So pick carefully what you focus on.

You will start seeing it everywhere.